Blood draws and x-rays and urinalysis, oh my!

Yeah, so, today kind of sucked.

Minion2 had to have some medical tests.

He was a real trooper about it all. I, however, now need some medication. Like maybe a vodka cranberry.

Minion2 has been sick since last weekend. It started with 2 days of throwing up, which overlapped with 3 days of diarrhea. Those went away, but the fever didn't. So, now he's had a consistent fever of about 102 for 6 days, even though all of his other symptoms seem to be gone.

I took him to the doctor this morning, thinking maybe he had an ear infection. Nope. Our pediatrician couldn't find anything wrong in his exam, so he sent us over for blood tests and chest x-rays and urinalysis.

Have you ever seen them do chest x-rays on a toddler? It's kind of like the Spanish Inquisition.

They set him in a toddler-sized hole in a square platform, locked him in, and then immobilized his upper body in a plexiglass tube with his arms pinned up over his head.

*I* was getting claustrophobic just watching.

My brave little minion whimpered a little, but managed to hold it together for back and side shots, as long as I was talking to him.

And then the tech - in what I can only assume was meant to be a casual, comforting tone - commented: "Oh, it's actually good for them to cry, because it gives us a better picture of their lungs".

Um, fuck you. Get my baby out of your torture device and give him his lollipop, bitch.

Okay, I didn't actually say that. But I thought it.

Then, there was the fun of having some junior phlebotomist who had to stab a 1.5 year old THREE TIMES to draw his blood sample.

And the torture trifecta was completed by the uncomfortable indignity of having to wear a plastic baggie taped around his little man-bits for several hours to gather a urine sample. (Don't think I wasn't saying a little thank-you to the universe for giving me a boy-child during that one, though.)

And all of this with a steady fever of 102.

The worst part is that, because it's Friday, we will probably have to wait until Monday to get the full test results back.

No, wait, the really worst part is that I've now googled his symptoms (because, yes, I am that mom) and I'm all freaked out that he might have a salmonella infection from eating peanut butter crackers that have since been recalled.

Or, maybe the really, really worst part is the worry that maybe they won't find anything at all.

Because I hate the not knowing.

The rational, logical, zen part of my brain knows that, of course, everything is going to be fine ... but that treacherous monkey brain loves to wreak havoc with the not-knowing.

So, yeah, Minion2 had kind of a sucky day.

And his mom's day wasn't so great, either.

Yeah, I know this is not the worst thing in the world. I know that there are much sicker kids in much tougher situations.

But I also know how awful it feels for any mom to watch her kids suffer and not be able to make it all better.

That might seriously be the worst feeling in the world.