I have no TV.
Well, to be specific, I do have a television (and great big HD LCD, in point of fact), but I have no television programming. And I haven't had it since last June, when we canceled our DirecTV subscription. Because we are
I know, right?! The HORROR!
But you know what?
*whispers* It's not that bad.
Wait,I know what you're thinking: How can a self-professed pop culture and scifi geek such as myself have possibly have survived so long without TV?!?!
How have I not gone all Jack Torrance and started chasing down the neighbors with an axe?! How have I managed to keep from cutting my co-workers' hearts out with spoons?! How is it that no bunnies have ended up in soup pots?
Quick, before the TV people come breaking down my door with their flashy thingies and force-feed me Retcon - let me let you in on a little secret: Between our Netflix Instant steaming video and the full-length episodes of many of my favorite shows that are available online (not to mention our own extensive DVD collection), we've hardly missed our satellite programming at all!
Sure, there are a few shows we miss. But, the truth is, we got used to the change pretty quickly.
Ha! So there, satellite TV company! Take that TV advertisers! We don't need no stinkin' TV programming! Not us! We are unplugged, man ... we are free ... we are ...
Guh-wha?! But I ... You can't ... I need ... What the Flagnar?! Noooooooo!
If you need me, I'll be the one in the fetal position under the coffee table frantically Googling alternative ISPs.