From the Vault: Nobody Told Me

In honor of Mother's Day, I'm recycling this post from my archives ...

When my first son was only a few weeks old, another mother said to me:

"Being a mother is like having your heart walking around outside of your body."

I agreed. But I didn't fully understand at the time.

I stood there with her and I thought of my beautiful new baby. I thought about how the surprising depths of my love for this itty bitty new person ... I thought about how becoming a mom throws all of your priorities out the window ... and I thought about how I would do anything for this amazing child of mine.

And I thought I understood what she was telling me.

But I didn't. Not yet.

All I knew in those precious, priceless first months was that my son was the new center of the universe. I knew the joy. I knew the excitement. I knew the overwhelming love. I even knew some of the nervousness and fear.

But I didn't know about the pain. Yet.

I didn't realize, then, that a Mother feels everything her child feels - only magnified.

I didn't know that when my sons were hurt, I would bleed.

"Being a mother is like having your heart walking around outside of your body."

Nobody tells you these things before you're a parent.

Nobody tells you that when they fall down, you feel the impact bruise your body. Nobody tells you that when they get sick, your skin burns with fever. Nobody tells you that when someone breaks their hearts, yours rips open, too.

Nobody tells you how joyously painful it is to let your Heart wander out into that big scary world every day, knowing that you can't protect them from all of the dangers they will face.

Then again, maybe they do tell you. Or try to. Maybe we just don't hear it. Maybe it's one of those things you have to learn on your own.

"Being a mother is like having your heart walking around outside of your body."


Happy Mother's Day,
Zen